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A Sick Anniversary

Celebrating one year of the podcast from Mexico City, where strangers wish you a good meal and toilets overflow without warning. Illness, isolation, ten M&M's in a bag, the kindness of a movie theater employee, and why I couldn't sell hair loss products for a living.

Thank you so much to everyone who has listened to this podcast over the past year. I truly appreciate you, and your ears.

You can see my film and video work here, if you're into that sort of thing: onefjef.com

Please show some support for the podcast and get access to some extra content by subscribing to the Patreon page: http://www.patreon.com/onefjef

Instagram: @onefjefpod

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onefjefpod

TikTok: @onefjefpodcast

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@onefjef

Email: onefjefpod@gmail.com

You can also call the podcast and leave a voicemail at 1-669-241-5882 and I will probably play it on the air.

Thank you for listening, please do it again, and then take a short break.

Onefjef is produced, edited & hosted by Jef Taylor.

Transcript
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Hola, mis amigos y amigas.

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Hello, my friends.

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I'm releasing this on June 3rd of twenty twenty-six, and that is the first

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anniversary of onefjef, the podcast.

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For those of you who don't do math, the first episode came out

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on June 3rd, twenty twenty-five.

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And it's been quite a ride, both the podcast and my life since then.

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Those of you who listen to the podcast quite a bit will know all these stories.

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If you haven't listened to it all, you can go back and listen to, you know, the road

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trip, moving across the country, going to Colombia, all these different things.

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It's been a year, and, uh, perhaps it is appropriate, perhaps it's not

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appropriate for the year to be ending with me being sick here in Mexico City.

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I've been sick for about ten days.

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I got sick ten days ago, about.

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It was a chest cold, head cold at first.

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You know, it was, uh, last week mostly it was just this, like, coughing, sneezing,

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runny nose thing, and that was horrible.

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It was the hardest week I've had since I moved here, for sure.

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I had some of the, uh, darkest and loneliest times that I've had.

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The combination of being sick, feeling like crap, and not really being

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able to leave my apartment very much because I was sick, being away from

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most of my friends and family back in the United States, all these things.

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The isolation really was the, the overwhelming thing.

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There were times when I got to a point where I was like,

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"What, what am I doing here?

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What have I done?

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Why did I move here?" And I suppose that that kind of a

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moment is somewhat inevitable when you do something like that.

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Can you hear that?

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That's the, um, the workmen.

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They're remodeling the neighbor's apartment, which is convenient,

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conveniently, um, timed to overlap with my illness here.

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So apologies for the saw or whatever else you'll hear banging.

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It's been, it's been a lot.

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Anyway, so I had that chest cold last week, head cold.

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I was feeling much better over the weekend.

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Uh, I even went out with a friend of mine on Saturday night.

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But then on Sunday or Monday, I think it was Monday morning, I, I don't

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know when I ate whatever I ate, but I ate something over the weekend

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that did not agree with me, and I now have a stomach something or other.

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I don't need to get into details on that.

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You can use your imagination.

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It's not been horrible, but it's been certainly unpleasant

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in multiple different ways.

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That again, use your imagination.

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But knock on wood, I do feel like I'm finally at the end of this thing.

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But again, I've said this before, or I've thought this before.

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I've thought and said it before, not on here, but you know.

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So hopefully, God willing, this is the end of it because I am really

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tired of being in my apartment and I'm really tired of being sick.

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Uh, it's like when you get sick and you forget what it

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feels like to even not be sick.

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You've been sick so long.

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Oy.

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Another magical thing that happened last week was I went out with a friend

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of mine for coffee on Saturday morning And when I got back to my apartment

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from getting coffee, I actually ate a chocolate croissant at that coffee house.

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I wonder if that was what did it.

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I don't know.

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Anyway, when I got back from getting coffee with my friend, I walked into

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my apartment and, uh, I took my shoes off, and I was just walking around, and

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I was like, "Why are my socks all wet?"

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And then I looked around, and then I noticed, oh, the toilet had been

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overflowing since I had left, and there was, like, a quarter inch of water,

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however many centimeters that is for the rest of the world, all over my floor.

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I mean, not every floor.

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Thank-fortunately, it didn't come in the bedrooms, but it was in

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the bathroom, the living room.

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It was in the kitchen.

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Yeah, it was a mess.

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It was a mess, and I had no idea how to clean it up.

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I only had three towels.

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I still only have three towels.

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I actually have a few more towels now.

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I reached out to the, the owner of the apartment and said, "This

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is what happened," you know.

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And, you know, we're kind of communicating back and forth in

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broken Spanish, broken English, and I'm like, "I don't know what to do.

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Is there a mop?" And he's like, "There's no mop." And he sent me a picture of like,

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you can use this device, this, like, mop.

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I guess you could call it a-- I don't know what it is, one of those

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things that you s- push water with.

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Like when you wa- when you wash your car windows, it's not a squeegee.

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It's the other side of the squeegee, but it's on a stick, and it's long.

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I don't know what to call it.

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Anyway, he showed me a picture of that with a rag attached

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to it to make it into a mop.

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I didn't have really a rag either.

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I didn't have-- I, I had really no capacity to clean up this water.

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Fortunately, the floor is cement, so it really-- it wasn't gonna

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leak down to the floor below.

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I don't think it did anyway.

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So I reached out to Patricia, and she ordered me a mop and some, like, dish

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towel rag kind of things, and those showed up about thirty minutes later.

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And still though, I only had then, what, six towels at this point,

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maybe seven, which wasn't really enough to clean it all up with.

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So eventually I-- This is an exciting story, isn't it?

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I know.

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So eventually, I got one of these, uh, squeegee things and started to

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just pushed water and found a, um, a dustpan and started pushing the

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water in that with the squeegee thing and then dumping it into the shower,

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and that took-- it took a while.

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It took quite a while, like two or three hours.

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I mean, and, and of course, the, the-- I should have mentioned earlier, as

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soon as I got home and saw the toilet overflowing, I-- the first thing I did

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was stop the toilet from overflowing.

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So yeah, I mean, I, I took care of it, but boy, uh, unpleasant.

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Unpleasant.

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Not how I wanted to spend my Saturday afternoon, and another in a long line of

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me clogging toilets all over the world.

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This is probably the pinnacle, this one Of me clogging toilets.

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And now perhaps I'll actually be m- be more careful.

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I honestly don't know what happened.

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Like, the, the toilet, number one, is garbage.

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I don't wanna explain the mechanics of why it's garbage, but it's…

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doesn't have a solid flush on it.

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So it's not entirely my fault, it's partially the toilet's fault.

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But yeah, I am going to be more careful with the toilet from

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now on, because I don't want that to happen again, obviously.

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Anyway, it's taken care of now.

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I mean, maybe I got sick because I was, like, cleaning up toilet

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water all day on Saturday.

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I don't know.

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I don't know.

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It doesn't matter now anyway.

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And then that night, a friend of mine and I had bought tickets to see the

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new Jim Jarmusch film at the Cineteca here in Mexico City, which is this

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amazing movie theater that many people have said, "You should-- You gotta

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go to Cineteca. Go to Cineteca. It's amazing," blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

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So finally, we were going to Cineteca, and we got dinner, and then I told

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her the whole story about the toilet overflowing, and she said, "Oh, no."

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And then we walked to… They have these, uh… Mexico City, they have

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many kinds of public transport.

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They have subways and buses, of course, and Ubers and whatever.

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But then they also have, uh, cable cars, like, you know, gondola things,

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like, uh, at a theme park, right?

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They have three or four lines of this cable car thing.

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And it's wonderful.

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It's a wonderful way to get around because it's quiet.

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You get to see the whole city.

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It's awesome.

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And the cable car went right to the Cineteca.

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So we're like, "This is great. We can just take the cable car." And it was wonderful.

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There was a full moon.

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Very pretty.

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Took the cable car, got to Cineteca pretty early 'cause I wanted to

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wander around and we were going to…

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She wanted to get popcorn, so we're wandering around the Cineteca.

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And most of the-- It's an enormous space.

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It's huge.

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And most of the vendors, though, w- that sold food and all that

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were closed, so we had to wander around trying to find one of those.

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And that was w- And there weren't a lot of people there, which I was also puzzled

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about 'cause I was like, "This is a…

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You know, there's movies.

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Why are there's nobody?" So I thought, "Well, maybe they're all in the movie.

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Maybe they let the movies out at the same time.

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I don't know." So we wander around there for a while, and then finally

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we're like, "Oh, we should, uh, we should find our theater," you know.

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And so we finally ask somebody which theater our movie's in, and come to

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find out that we are in the wrong Cineteca, that there are in fact two

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Cinetecas in Mexico City, and the one we were in was not the correct one.

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Which made me kind of happy because, I mean, the Cineteca that we were in was

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beautiful and big and cool and everything, but, like, it was strange 'cause it

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wasn't like the pictures that I'd seen on, like, Google Maps or whatever.

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So… And it w- But it was dark, so I was like, "Oh, maybe it's just dark." No,

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it was the wrong, it was the wrong one.

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So what a hilarious misunderstanding.

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I mean, yeah.

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But it was still a fun night.

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Riding the cable car was fun and, and now I still have to look forward

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to going to the real Cineteca or the, the main Cineteca, the big one.

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Do have an announcement of sorts.

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Due to both my illness and my need for a bit of a respite from

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editing podcasts, I am, I'm taking a bit of a break with the podcast.

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I'm still going to release episodes every week, but they might just be short

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little things like this for a little bit.

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I'm currently, like, interviewing people, and I've got a bunch of interviews

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in the can for, you know, season two episodes, interviews and so forth, but

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it's a lot of work to edit these episodes and I've wanted to put a little b- bit

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more thought into how I'm gonna edit these interviews and so forth and so

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on before I just start releasing them.

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So I'm just taking a bit of a break, kind of a one-year anniversary break of sorts.

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But not really a break, 'cause I'm still gonna be releasing episodes

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every week, but the interviews will come back soon enough.

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Don't you worry.

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Don't you worry.

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So appreciate your understanding.

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Appreciate your continuing to listen to the podcast.

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Contin- appreciate your… Everybody, I appreciate everybody who's listened to

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the podcast over the last, the last year.

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Thank you for listening.

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Thank you for coming back.

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Most of all, thank you for supporting me on Patreon, those of you who

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are supporting me on Patreon.

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And if you aren't supporting me on Patreon, I can think of nothing better

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to give me for a one-year podcastiversary gift than to go on patreon.com/onefjef

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and sign up to support the podcast.

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For as little as $5 a month, that's a mere 100 pesos, give or take,

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you can help support the podcast.

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As I said, you can, you can get access to some early content, and you can feel

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like you are amongst the onefjef elite.

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Not the proletariat, the elite.

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And you can make me feel better in this time of feeling bad.

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Uh, so yes, go to patreon.com/onefjef and sign up.

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Please and thank you.

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And while I'm at it, why don't you go ahead and like, rate, subscribe,

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and review this podcast if you have a moment, when you have a moment.

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It doesn't take very long, and it really does help the algorithmical

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gods to put this podcast in the place where more people can find it.

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So yeah, like, rate, subscribe, review on whatever platform

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you happen to be listening on.

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And, um, God, I'm so tired.

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My brain isn't really working very well.

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I apologize

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I can't honestly believe that I've been making this podcast for a year.

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I couldn't believe it when I did five episodes.

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I couldn't believe it when I got to 10.

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Couldn't believe when I got to 20.

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You get, you get the pattern.

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But yeah, having done this for a year, and there's, like, more than

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50 episodes out there, I can't…

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Go me.

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So thank you for sticking with me if you've been there, and thank

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you for listening just right now if this is your first episode.

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I promise you that this is not, uh, typical of all the episodes.

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This is, uh, a bit of an anomaly because of the sickness and the,

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uh, sickness and the sickness.

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But if you are enjoying this, then by all means, please let me know.

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Send me an email at onefjefpod@gmail.com, or call me at 669-241-5882.

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That's 1-669-241-5882.

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Oh, that one was not good.

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It's hard to make a song out of a phone number, I've learned.

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Garfield 1-2323.

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I need something like that.

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Does anybody else remember that?

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Clevelanders?

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Is that only a Cleveland thing?

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It was a TV commercial back in the day.

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Garfield 1-2323.

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I don't even know what they did.

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Was it, like, siding?

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I think it was siding, right?

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But that's, like, probably 40 years ago now.

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Garfield 1-2323.

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Now you're gonna just… Now you're gonna call Garfield 1-2323 and try

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to get in touch with the podcast.

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How do you call Garfield, I wonder?

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I think it wouldn't work anymore.

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Garfield, G-A-R-F-I-E-L-D.

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No, that's too many numbers.

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Garfield 1-2323.

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G-A-R-F-I-E-L-D 1-2323.

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Yeah, that doesn't work at all.

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I never really thought about that, but that was the phone

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number that they would advertise.

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If anybody has any information about this, I would love to hear it.

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Garfield 1-2323.

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How was one supposed to call that?

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Perhaps the business didn't do well.

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Garfield 1-

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So most phone numbers are like one, two, three, four, five,

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six, seven, eight, nine, 10

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No, it still doesn't work.

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Too many numbers.

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Maybe the extra numbers don't matter.

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I don't know.

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Yeah, just gonna keep talking about old Cleveland, Ohio television

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advertisements with memorable jingles.

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That's what this podcast is gonna be now.

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It's about old Cleveland, Ohio commercial jingles that we can remember.

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Garfield one.

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That-- Do I-- That's, that's an earworm though.

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I mean, if you're from Cleveland and you don't remember Garfield

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one, two, three, two, three, if you're of a certain age, then, uh,

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email me at onefjefpod@gmail.com, and we'll talk about it.

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No, don't email me with that.

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No, do.

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I mean, I'm not gonna tell you not to email me.

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Why would I do that?

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You know what else you should do?

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You should follow the podcast at onefjefpod on Instagram, also on

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Facebook, I think it's onefjefpod, and then on TikTok at onefjefpodcast.

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You have to add the cast on that one because onefjefpod had been taken By whom?

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I don't know.

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I should check, and then I should harass them until they

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give me the onefjef pod name.

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But until then, TikTok onefjefpodcast.

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That's not the number one.

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It's O-N-E-F-J-E-F-P-O-D or P-O-D-C-A-S-T.

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You understand.

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I was putting videos on there, like, every day as kind of a auxiliary

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content for the podcast or, I don't know, just for shits and giggles,

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and I haven't done it for a few days.

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I should probably do one today or tomorrow to promote this magical episode.

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But yeah, doing some fun stuff on there.

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People seem to like it, getting a lot of views.

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So I don't know.

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If you wanna see what I look like, do that.

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Go to those places.

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And if you've ever been curious to see, uh, my, my work, like my

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professional video and film work, you can actually go to my website at

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onefjef.com, where you can see all the films and stuff that I've made.

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And if you like what you see and you need some video work, you can hire me.

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So that's exciting for you.

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It's exciting for me too, depending on what you're trying to sell or

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what kind of video you wanna make.

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I, uh, got a job offer before I left for Mexico City for a job doing marketing

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for a hair loss product company.

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Hair loss company product.

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No, whatever.

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I-- Word order is getting all weird in my head because I'm learning

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Spanish, and I'm spending so much time learning Spanish, and word order

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gets all mixed up there compared to the English, so you understand.

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Anyway, yeah, hair loss company selling hair loss products.

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And, you know, it was a really good offer, but I, I just, I just couldn't do it.

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I just couldn't do it.

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And they r- he really wanted me, the guy.

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He really wanted to hire me.

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But I, I, I, I imagined myself editing videos for Instagram and

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TikTok and whatever, selling hair loss products for the next however

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long, and it, and it gave me chills.

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And I apologize to those of you who may be owners of hair loss companies.

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I'm not trying to, um, diss any.

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N-no shame in selling hair loss products.

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Um, it's a real thing.

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But I couldn't.

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It's not for me to, to, to market those.

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It's not, that's not a me thing.

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That's, that's somebody else thing.

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And I'm not sure that there'd be like, you know, I could go way outside of

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the box and make something crazy.

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I'm gonna break the, break new ground in hair loss advertising, whatever.

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I actually tried hair loss product.

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Was it Rogaine?

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I tried that, uh, years ago when I lived in New York 'cause, you know, I've been

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slowly losing my hair for many years.

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So I thought, "Well, let me see if I can slow the loss here." So I bought

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some Rogaine, and it was this kind of f- like, put it on your scalp.

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You know, of course you put it on your scalp.

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But I… Well, now they've got, like, pills and everything, but back then it

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was just this… And it burned my scalp.

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It, like, was very uncomfortable.

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So I did it two or three times, but, like, after I put it on, you have to leave it

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on, and my scalp would just be burning.

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And I thought, "This is not worth it for me." You know, I do want more hair, right?

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I want the hair loss to stop, but I don't wanna sit here with a burning

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scalp for an hour every day or twice a day, I think it was even.

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I don't remember.

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No.

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So the hair has continued to lose, to go.

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Boy, I'm having trouble with words today.

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The hair has continued to go, but, uh, I still got some, and

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I'm 52, so that's exciting for me.

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My father, like, just had the ring, you know?

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I can't remember my dad not having the, you know, the ring

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bald spot scenario, you know?

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If that happened to me, I would just shave it all off.

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But my dad, God bless him, he, he stuck with it.

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He didn't really do a comb-over either.

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A lot of people do a comb-over in response to the ring.

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What… Is there any other name for that?

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The ring, you know what I'm talking about.

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You don't see it as often anymore.

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People seem to just, like, shave all their hair off if that happens.

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But back in the day, people would, people would rock that.

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They say that hair loss comes from your mom's side, so I guess that's lucky for

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me because I don't… The ring, the rim.

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The rim or the ring?

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Whatever

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This is the kind of podcast content you guys are looking for.

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This is, um, but the problem is I, I would talk about Mexico City and, and

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my experience in Mexico, but I've been sick, so I haven't really had many, so I

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can't really-- There's not a lot to share.

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I, I did write something down, though.

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Hold on.

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Let me see.

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I wrote a note.

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Oh, all right.

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Here's one.

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Uh, maybe a lot of you know this already, but, uh, another charming

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thing about Mexico City and Mexico in general, probably Latin America

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maybe, but you'll be sitting in a restaurant eating, and a stranger

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will walk by and just say, "Provecho.

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Provecho," which means, like, bon appetit, have a good meal.

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But strangers say it to strangers.

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In the United States, I've never said, you know, "Have a good meal" or "Bon

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appetit" to a stranger, never, nor have I had a stranger say it to me, except when

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you're, like, a waiter in a restaurant, yes, of course, but it's different.

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This is just some random person who maybe finished their dinner or just got

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into the restaurant just walking by, "Provecho." That's wonderful, right?

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How wonderful is that?

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I love it.

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And also, when we were at the movie theater on Saturday, and after we asked

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them about where our theater was and found out that we were at the wrong theater and

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walked away, about five minutes later, the woman who we'd asked ran up to us and

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was like, "Hey, hey, hey, there's a…"

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In Spanish, so.

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But, "There's an- another movie playing in th- in this theater at that time

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if you wanna see that." And we were like, "Is it in Spanish?" And they

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were like, "Yes." And we were like, "Yeah, no, we can't, we can't really do

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that." There's no subtitles, of course.

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But it was very kind.

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Like, they went out of their way.

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It's a huge theater.

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They ran all-- Probably looked all over the place for us to find us.

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I also bought some M&M's at the theater, and the, you know, in pretty much every

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other country but the United States, when you go to the movie theater,

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like, if you buy a small soda at the movie theater in the United States,

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you're getting what would be probably bigger than a large soda in almost

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every other country in the world.

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It's, it's just a lot of fluid.

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And, like, I think the large is probably, like, a liter.

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It has to be, like, a liter of soda.

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It's absurd.

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It's insane.

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And, like, at the, you know, the, the baseball games and so forth,

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y- you ask yourself why America has an obesity epidemic.

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There are answers right in front of us all over the place.

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You know, you go to McDonald's, you can, like… Even the small at

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McDonald's is pretty big, and you can upsize the thing to get, like, a bucket

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of-- You can get, like, a bucket of soda if you really want, I imagine.

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Why don't they just start putting all the food and the soda in a, just a

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bucket and handing it to you, and you can just eat like a pig at a trough?

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Hooray, America.

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That's not happening, but it, it's not far away.

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It's not far.

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They're about to have a UFC fight on the front lawn of the White House.

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Buckets of food mixed together with a, just eating with your mouth.

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It's not, not far away.

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But I digress.

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Um, so I bought M&M's at the movie theater, and, uh, you know, normally I

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don't mind the size differences with, you know, snack foods and beverages here.

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Normally, I kind of quite like it.

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But in the case of the M&M's, there were l- literally, like,

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ten M&M's in this bag of M&M's.

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Ten, maybe 12.

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It was not a large… And it was just, like, w- what are, what are we doing?

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Maybe it's a movie theater thing.

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In the United States, in movie theaters, you know, all the candy

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and stuff is always in different kind of containers than they come

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out in the non-theater world.

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So maybe there's a smaller bag of M&M's.

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I don't understand, but it was a very small bag of M&M's.

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Maybe that's what made me sick.

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Maybe it was the M&M's.

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No, I'll never blame M&M's for getting me sick.

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I can't do that.

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I can't do it.

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Something I've also learned from being sick is that Ritz crackers,

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very inexpensive here in Mexico City.

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I got four sleeves of Ritz crackers for about a dollar, $1.50.

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That's a solid deal.

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Ritz is a good cracker.

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It's one of my favorites.

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I like the, uh, Triscuits.

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Those are good.

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Buttery.

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Yeah.

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And then there's the Club cracker, which is the long one, not necessarily

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a saltine, but a Club cracker.

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Of course, you can only get those if you're in the club.

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All right, enough of this nonsense.

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I really appreciate you listening this far.

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I appreciate all of you, each and every one of you, for listening to

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the podcast, for letting me into your ear holes every week for the

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last year, or maybe just twice.

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I don't know.

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But I really do appreciate you.

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You…

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You're good people.

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You are.

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You're good people.

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We're all good people.

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And I'm gonna wrap this magical sick anniversary episode up with a quote from

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the late great comedian Mitch Hedberg.

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"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just gonna ask them where they're

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going and hook up with them later."

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I'll see you next week.

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Very good, Jeffrey

About the Podcast

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onefjef
Expat life in Mexico City: interviews and solo dispatches about language, culture, and what it really feels like to leave your life behind and move to CDMX.

About your host

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Jef Taylor

Jef Taylor is an editor, filmmaker, and reluctant grown-up. He hosts onefjef, where he talks to people (and sometimes himself) about work, purpose, and the strange ways life unfolds. Before podcasting, he spent years shaping other people’s stories—now he’s telling his own.